Trapped in my own creation
by Hanahakk
Summary: Just how did Forge get stuck in Middleverse, and how did it feel to be stuck in there for such a long time? Please be kind in reviewing. Rated for cursing and minor mentions of violence.


Socky will now write about Forge's time in Middleverse. It can hardly have been THAT fun in there.. the guy was locked in there for so many years!

This fanfiction will be attempted from his point of view, cause there are hardly many more points of view ALL ALONE in Middleverse.

So anyway.. this may or may not be sort of OOC, please don't physically harm me. Plus English is not my first language, but I'm honestly trying my best.

Disclaimer: I do not own Forge or X-Men Evolution. Honestly I'm not even sure who does anymore, but I guess it's either Marvel or WB.

--

Tomorrow it will be my parents' anniversary. Which means I can finally show them what I've made for them. I think they will definitely be proud of me. I think I'm kind of proud of me too, I mean, this has never been done before. Nobody knows about this technology but me, which is kind of thrilling when you think about it. It's strange, because it's actually really simple. I didn't make anything new. I just discovered something no human has ever discovered before.

_Pocket dimensions._

I think that's an appropriate way to name them. I don't want to become one of those guys that name all sorts of things they discover after themselves. Also, I'm not sure if I want them to be named "Silvercloud dimensions." That just doesn't sound right, it doesn't fit their nature, their beauty, or their purpose.

Tomorrow, people will know that _pocket dimensions_ exist. My parents will probably tell them. They'll make a big deal out of it, it probably is a big deal all by itself, but I'm not sure if I want it to be. I just want it to be a gift.

--

It's late. The gift is still in my school. I forgot to take it home, maybe it was stupidity on my part. But then again, my father had come to get me from school today, so maybe it was for the best. I don't want them getting any ideas. Still, I have to get it before tomorrow. That is why I'm currently climbing out of my bedroom window.

I think it's okay if I sneak into school as long as I don't get caught. It's the sneaking out of school part the teachers are stressing the most, anyway. Also, if I don't break anything, is it still breaking and entering? I'm not even sure if I'll even have to enter anything other than my lab. That's the beauty of screwdrivers and spoons versus basement windows.

My lab is, I think, the most comfortable room in all Bayville. My room comes in close second, but just being alone in this place full of wonderful machines and knowing that there are hundreds of people above you, and they don't know you're there, they don't know of your safe haven in this insane place ruled by grades and looks. It means so much to me, it's so much more than just a place where I work on my little projects.

There it is, _the gift_. It's not very big, it's just a little bigger than my chest. And my chest is really not that big. The gift is this small on purpose, I want my parents to be able to take it anywhere they want, so that they'll always have their Middleverse, whenever they need it.

_Middleverse._

Why do I always keep thinking of all those cool names? I don't know what's been going on in my head lately. [Despite being one] I'm not an expert on teenage boys, but I think I should be thinking about other things than the things I think about.

The point is, most of the things I think about don't exist yet. Things that actually exist really don't interest me that much. Maybe I'm a nerd. Actually, I probably am.

--

_Damn._

_Damn damn damn damn damn._

This was NOT supposed to happen. How could I have been this stupid? I blame tiredness. Those things only happen when you go alone to a dark place in the middle of the night and handle sensitive machinery. It's definately the worst case scenario.

I'm _**stuck **_in Middleverse. There's no way I can get out by myself. Nobody knows I'm here. Nobody knows what my machine does. How the hell is anyone going to save me?

...Is anyone going to save me?

This is bad. This is very is terrible. I'll probably stay here until I die. ..Die? I can't die. I'm seventeen. I can't die.

Maybe I won't. I haven't really tested it yet, but ever since I thought of Middleverse, I had this feeling that things, and humans, couldn't age in here. Maybe I won't have to eat, which is probably good, because starvation is really not the way I want to go. It just sounds terrible. I've been here for almost three hours, and I can still taste my toothpaste. I guess I was right, then. I haven't ever been wrong on a feeling yet, and I suspect I won't be for quite a while.

It could stay that way forever.

Forever does sound pretty long, but It can't actually be long, because it can't be measured. But still, it's longer than anything else, ever. It's scary.

Will people remember me? What are my parents going to think? _My parents!_ I would gladly give both of my hands and my legs too if I could just go back to them. This just can't be happening. I can't accept it. I can't spend eternity in here. I miss my parents, I miss them more than anything else. Worse than that, _they'll miss me._ And they won't have any idea what happened to me.

When I think about it, I don't remember closing the window. I mean, I was coming back. It's probably wide open. And I'm not coming back. In forever. I think it's pretty clear what my parents will think. I really don't want them to think that!

I really don't want to spend my life in here. I especially don't want to spend _forever _in here. I shouldn't be spending forever in anything. I want to die. Can I die? What would happen if I gnawed my limbs off? Would the blood seep out? Is my blood regenerating itself? _Am I breathing?_

Am I going crazy?

--

I got out of my lab. There were people in there. For a second I felt like there was a heavy load lifted off my chest. I saw one of my buddies. Waved at him. Everyone vanished. I felt like my chest was lifted off my chest.

--

I'm crying a lot right now, which I would normally be ashamed of but it's okay because nobody can see me. I think I'll cry a bit more. I feel so lost, I just want to wake up in my bed. I want this all to disappear. I wish I was just dreaming. But, I'm wide awake, and I'll probably continue being awake for a long time.

--

It's kind of uncomfortable in here. It's like I can see much less or something, like the horizon ends right in front of my nose and all after that... just thinking about it gives me a headache. It's like the whole place is well.. wavy, instead of a better word. It's hard to explain. This place just feels so.. I can't explain it either. I feel like a fish taken out of its natural habitat and stuffed into a plastic bag, except maybe that the fish doesn't know that it's going to spend eternity in said bag. That's one lucky fish.

--

Sometimes I can catch them talking about me. I never realized they thought I was this weird. It was kind of shocking, but then again, I guess all of it doesn't matter anymore. It's not like they'll ever see me again.

Apparently I was just a technology freak. That was all they knew about me. Hello, I'm Jonathan Silvercloud, technology freak. Nice to meet you, I'm Andrea Hawkins, window licker. I lick windows.

Yeah, I might just be going crazy. I'll be a crazy technology freak. A crazy technology freak living forever in a pocket dimension he invented and went and got himself stuck in. If I could ever get a gravestone, this is definitely what it's going to say.

--

I can hear them talking about me more often now. Apparently the principal called my parents, my parents freaked out, and the police is searching for me. I think the open window has something to do with this. If I had closed it before I left, my disappearance would have been a lot more mysterious.

I'm hearing a lot of stories about myself, each crazier than the other. In one I just ran away from home, but I'm not really hearing that one anymore because apparently it's just too boring. There are many variations, the most popular one of me getting kidnapped by insane serial killers and my battered dead body buried in cement in a house foundation.

Heh. I wish.

There is also this story, which I like a lot less, about my whole life being a big joke. It's really insane, actually. Of course it's insane. It was originally made by Susan Felder. I'm pretty sure she'll become a science fiction novelist when she grows up. I want to grow up too, but I know I can't, so I don't think too much about it.

Anyway, the story pretty much states that my whole life is forged. That I'm actually one big forge. Yeah, it's insane. She says I was so amazingly talented in electronics because I was actually a superintelligent mutant sent to the school to watch the other students. Like spy on them.

Oh, yeah, Susan, I am a superintelligent mutant. I just flunk at English and History to fool you guys. I actually know all the answers. Oh, hey, and know what? I _never_ watch the other students. Ever.

Oh, and I am a forge. Well, actually I am _the_ Forge. But I am not forged, I forge stuff. I create it. I'm a creator. Back when I was in normal verse, I never realized that. But now I know. I'm a creator. I _am_ Forge.

I think I secretly wish I was a superintelligent mutant. It would explain a lot of things. I don't have any freaky explanations for the freaky things in my head. Actually I would love to have a normal explanation, but I just can't have nice things.

God, I miss my parents so much. I can't imagine what they're feeling right now. I feel kind of guilty over it. If I wouldn't have pressed that damn button they would be so much happier! And I would not be stuck in a damn pocket dimension for eternity. Forge does not press button, everybody wins. But, Forge did press button, so everything is fucked up. Am I swearing? Wow. It took three days, and I'm finally swearing. Whoopie.

I want to go back, I want to go home. I miss my parents, I miss my friends, I miss my bed!

--

Today everyone I knew graduated. I felt kind of sad. Especially because it was mostly outside, and I can't go outside. Middleverse won't allow me.

I realize I'm not going to see those people anymore. Just the thought of it makes me feel very lonely. I would like to say goodbye to them, but I know I can't. I just hope they are going to have great futures in this big changing world and.. oh, I'm crying? I'm crying now. I haven't cried since the day I got here, and I really don't know why. Why am I crying now? How come I can cry and not digest? After all this time I can still taste the toothpaste in my mouth!

--

I just realized I haven't peed in eight years. That really is something special. I think I've stopped tasting the toothpaste too, but I don't think it's really gone, I've just gotten too used to it to notice. Now I can't taste anything.

Middleverse kind of grows on you. You get a lot of time to think, and you can do anything you want and nobody can judge you. I think I've gone streaking in a hall full of people about twenty-eight times now. It stopped being fun after the first eleven times, but I had nothing better to do. I'm surprised I haven't heard any ghost stories yet.

I've spent most of my time thinking, and I'm finding it more and more probable that I'm a superintelligent mutant. I mean, I've always been different, you know? I'm less like other kids than other kids are like each other. I think that's the definition of it.

Maybe I should do something more with my middleverse idea. Maybe I should make a pocket dimension, inside of the pocket dimension! Maybe I could even make it thought activated! The possibilites... I'm smiling again. It feels great.

Maybe.. maybe I could make the pocket dimension in myself. I've been thinking a lot about this, and every time I think about it it makes more sense. I want to _be _a machine. I don't think I want to be a full time machine because that is kind of scary. I bet I can do it. I bet the junk I accidentally zapped in with me is enough to make a robotic arm. I can do this. I feel like I've done it before, but I know I haven't. And who cares if I fail? Not even I.

I'll be a part time cyborg. I think it will be fun.

--


End file.
